Remember to be kind.
Some time ago I had never heard of this thing called babywearing! I could not imagine spending $100 on a piece of fabric and thought people were absolutely insane for spending hundreds or thousands on something that just held your baby. I mean, what was the big deal?!?! Oh, I had so much to learn. The only carrier I had used with my 7 and 6 year old was a bjorn and a hammock style carrier that was free. Neither served its purpose well and was uncomfortable so I gave up not knowing the world that was out there.
Then six years later came baby number 3. I “splurged” on my first carrier. I bought a package deal of an infantino mei tai and a size six little frog woven wrap. I was determined but scared at such an investment. And most of all, I was so intimidated. The first day I used a woven wrap my little one was 12 days old. I watched a YouTube video over and over again. I paused, wrapped, and then played it again. Not going to lie, it was the worst wrap job I’ve ever experienced. I tried to do a kangaroo carry, I was dripping in sweat, about to cry. Why couldn’t I get this right! My top rail was so loose that I could of turned him sideways. So what else was I to do? Facebook, Facebook is wonderful sometimes! I went on some babywearing help groups and posted questions/pictures/thoughts/frustrations. These people understood me; they had been there at one point in time. After some more tries it started to click. It got easier. I learned more carries. I wrapped multiple times a day. And oh, when I learned to back carry at 3 months, that was a game changer! Hello dishes, I’m so happy I can do you with a child strapped to me!
Now in current times, I own some carriers that I never would of dreamed of spending money on. My husband went from questioning why I’d spend money on these “things” and why I needed more than one to understanding it and even loving it himself (I’ve converted him to a tula and wrapping). But I caught myself a few weeks ago having some judgmental thoughts about a mom’s choice in carrier. And in that moment I felt absolutely horrible and ashamed! I had been there, I had started with carriers that might not of been the best for comfort or the ones that were not a popular choice in the babyworld. All that mom wanted was to carry her baby close to her. Maybe she was nervous about it, as I had been starting out. And just maybe she didn’t even know about the other options that are out there, I certainly hadn’t. I caught myself in those thoughts, looked at her and gave the biggest smile and exclaimed how happy I was to see another momma babywearing. And the smile she gave me in return brought me back to the reality that there isn’t a “right” or “wrong” carrier. Just because I had one that was expensive didn’t mean that the experience of having my little one snuggled to me was superior to hers. Hello reality check, Krista!
The point is, be kind. I’m sure many of us have gotten some snide remarks. I’ve heard quite a few of them. When we have children we open up to the world of people opinions! No matter how you carry your baby, whether it be a soft structure carrier, wrap, homemade, sling, strollers, hey even with your hands! You Are Awesome. And from one momma to another, I’m sorry if you’ve ever felt bad or judged. I, for one, am trying harder 🙂